Notes on Harry Potter

My knowledge of Harry Potter is pretty limited – and I want it to stay that way. I've never read the books and found it hard watching the tedious films. I don't really mind that millions of people (including, it seems, adults) are hoodwinked into liking his exploits as long as I have nothing to do with it. But recent powers beyond my control have forced me into entering the world of H.P. Namely that my daughter is obsessed with him (I almost broke down in tears when she said she preferred the Harry Potter films to Star Wars).

So I've endured the films, been to Platform 9 3/4 at Kings Cross, bought my daughter a wand and taken her to the Harry Potter Studios (actually quite impressive). But my main gripe with Harry Potter is I've very rarely seen him do any magic, or anything at all for that matter. Harry's main problem (aside from being dull) is that his 'reputation' proceeds him. Being the chosen one, the weight of expectation upon him makes him practically impotent. In your average two and a half hour Harry Potter film, for at least the first two hours he does very little. If you're lucky in the last half hour Harry will wave his wand and a bright light will come out of it. I doubt the boy could even do a card trick.

His two side kicks, Ron and Hermione, are likewise pretty drippy. Ron dresses like a reject from the 1970s (I did actually think the films were set in the that decade) with his brown tank tops and bowl haircut. Hermione is just annoying.

Previously on Barnflakes:
Daisy Meadows Rainbow Magic Books
Eponymous Heroes 'Largely Dull'